Mary Annie can schedule you in.'s Journal [entries|friends|calendar]
Mary Annie can schedule you in.

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You laugh with me, shout, scream
Now tell me you're staying
I know I know I know, you're still my love
The same as I love you, you'll always love me too
This love isn't good unless it's me and you.
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Profile. [
Posted on the 1st of January 1st, 2020
]
All the firemen shake
A photo from father's arms
Cinder and smoke
You'll ask me to pray for rain
With ash in your mouth
You'll ask it to burn ( again )

Relationship Post [
Posted on the 15th of September 15th, 2012
]
( Relationships! )

Breeze [
Posted on the 1st of March 1st, 2010
]
[ music | "Breeze," Apollo Sunshine ]

I'm on my way back to the city: posting journals via your cell phone, how different is this from high school? Loes got all horrified at the idea of me taking the bus back in, so I'm in the back of a taxi, watching the city come into focus, all of its sharp angles and bright lights. New York might not be the most amazing place in the world anymore--I'm not thirteen anymore--but it's home. Well, no. Home is where he is, but...we're about to build a life here, and coming back to the apartment, to get back to my life, it feels like I'm making progress to who we want to be when we grow up because, yeah, part of me is Logan's Future Wife, but I'm also Annie Spier, the Photographer. The grown up. No matter how frustrating things are, sharing our life with Trev, I know that Loes and I will end up okay; I need to work on the other part of me now. Figure out what to do with this awful job, try to make my mark, and if not...decide what's important to me, and what that means. If I stick it out longer, if I leave and try to find someplace else. If I have to go crawling back to Cam or to Stacey's stepmom asking for help finding a better gig. I want to do this on my own: I just...don't know what that means. I'll find it, though. I hope. That's why I'm back in New York, blown in like the breeze. The way that a spring wind feels new and full of change.

I complained in my last journal that this wasn't how I thought it was going to be, as a grown up. Maybe...I need to make that happen opposed to waiting for it to fall into place.

Expectations [
Posted on the 23rd of January 23rd, 2010
]
[ music | "Expectations," Belle and Sebastian ]

I hate my job. I hate my boss...I hate how he has decided that calling me by my name is too difficult so he should just call me The Girl. "Oh, The Girl will be staging the Green Room. The Girl will take your bags. The Girl can run and get you a coffee. The Girl can get it." He hasn't let me take a photo in two months, and yesterday, he had me run to In and Out Burger for him; the new intern thought I was his assistant instead of a real photographer here in the studio for a solid week. I hate my job. Being able to go home from LA tomorrow and knowing he'll be out there for the week feels like heaven. Then again, I'm looking at the schedule and in two weeks, I have to be with him on a trip to Chicago with only one intern as a buffer between me and his incredible, callous ego. Why do I feel the urge to beat my head against the wall...

I've been engaged for three weeks, and I don't feel like I've been able to enjoy it at all because we've had so many events to photograph during acting awards season, and now Logan leaves for spring training in Florida almost right away in February...and with Trevor staying with us, it's so hard to feel like we're a grown-up couple starting a life together. It's more like three friends, staying in an apartment. Logan's proposal was like a fairy tale come true.

This isn't exactly how I thought happily ever after would begin.

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